My Christmas Game

I've been doing a little Christmas shopping this week, but it doesn't really feel like Christmas to me, and I've been trying to figure out what's missing. The decorations are there, the music is there; the sights and sounds and smells that one associates with the season are all present and accounted for. The problem, I thought, must be me. I have somehow disconnected myself from the warmth and love and general goodwill that has always been the Christmas season for me. Looking back over my favorite Christmases past, the thing that stands out as having made them extraordinary was the human connection factor. People. Loved ones, strangers all wishing great and happy things for me, and I for them. Having distinguished that, I went shopping yesterday to test my theory of what's missing.

I encountered dozens and dozens of people. Most passed me by without even making eye contact, and not one person smiled or said "Merry Christmas" to me. Nobody. I was surprised at how sad that made me feel. It made me want to go back in time 60 years or so, and move to whichever place most resembles the fictional Bedford Falls.

At the end of the day, someone did finally speak to me, and it's not her fault that I was dissatisfied with her attempt. When I checked out at the grocery store at 9 o'clock p.m., the clerk said, "Have a nice day!" Have a nice day? It's 9 p.m. It's December. It's the Christmas season. Have a nice day? When, tomorrow? What about "Have a nice Christmas!" Have a nice day??? I walked out of the store shaking my head. What the heck is going on?

Rainer Maria Rilke, a personal favorite, once wrote “Just as language has no longer anything in common with the thing it names, so the movements of most of the people who live in cities have lost their connection with the earth, with each other; they hang, as it were, in the air, hover in all directions, and find no place where they can settle.”

Are we so disconnected from each other that we're just floating, isolated and disinterested, through lives devoid of real communication and relationships? Most Christians believe that we are all the spirit children of a single Heavenly Father. If that is truly the case, then it stands to reason that we are already profoundly connected. "They" say we should be afraid of offending someone who may not share our beliefs, but when did we all grow to be so easily offended? And why is it another person's responsibility to see that we don't get offended? No matter what they do or say, we could choose to be affronted; it's a game no one can win. If who we truly are is a literal spirit family, then being so proud and so defensive and so separate must be very hard work on a subconscious level, as acting against our nature always is. No wonder we're so lonely. No wonder we're so tired.

The struggle to stay out of each others way seems pointless when, in moments of selflessness, we realize how simple making a difference for a fellow human being really is. No one understands that better than this guy, Juan Mann. All he does is to encourage people to let down their guard for the amount of time it takes to embrace each other. Watch this... it's beautiful! (and read Juan's story here: http://www.freehugscampaign.org/)



The philosopher and theologian Augustine of Hippo wrote, “Since you cannot do good to all, you are to pay special attention to those who, by the accidents of time, or place, or circumstances, are brought into closer connection with you.”

I'm totally down with that, and willing to take it on. That's what Christmas is all about... paying special attention to people! I love people, and I want them to experience being loved, especially at this time of the year! I believe that every person who crosses my path, does so for a purpose, and to let them simply pass by unnoticed is a missed opportunity to make a difference. So here's the game I'm playing; wearing my biggest, brightest, most welcoming smile, I'm going to wish a "Merry Christmas" to as many people as I possibly can between now and Christmas Day, and I'm going to mean it! It doesn't matter what your personal beliefs are... I hope that on December 25th, 2008 you are as merry and as happy as you have ever been! I hope your heart is light, and you have a day filled with joy and love and fun! My way of expressing that wish for you is "MERRY CHRISTMAS!"

Will you play the game with me? Play it in your own way, but please play it all out, and share your results with me!

Oh... and God bless us, every one!